“Even to your old age and gray hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you.” Isaiah 46:4
I snuggled up to my kids this week while my oldest began to read out loud. What a great bonding experience, right? Until I realized I nodded off through most of the chapter and barely remembered a thing! Yep, he noticed and it wasn’t the first time, nor was it the end of the day—it was morning! I felt terrible and then I remembered just days before trying to read a comic to my youngest and I had to hold the comic book further back and still couldn’t make out some of those tiny microscopic words! If the message hadn’t come through clear enough, I went out to play a game of “kick” ball tag with my kids (they create these ideas!) and by the end, my right hip wasn’t having it. I tried alternating with the left, but that was super uncoordinated. Kick after kick…made me realize something. I’m getting older and my youth is fading…
These signs weren’t the first. Age, it is a slow, gradual process. Little things change and eventually add up to bigger ones. Like when I had someone approach me to tell me how much she loved what I was doing with my hair, “just letting it go gray.” Then when the little boy at the park said, “You are young and old.” (Because I looked “young” but my hair had many grays). I can smile at these because despite my jokes, I actually appreciate where I am at. I worked hard to get old, ha. I have traversed the valley and I have walked with the Lord to earn these gray hairs, but if I am honest, my greatest sadness of letting go of youth, is fear of disappointing my children when I can’t endure the same things I once could.
I can’t run as long, sleep in as many places, have the tolerance for the arguments, nor care if I am the “rotten egg,” because I am the last one places. I can’t always stay alert through the entire movie unless I remove all comforts (like the couch I am sitting on) to sit up close and may even have to fold laundry to keep my hands and mind going. I can’t always do the piggy back rides unless planned and hips squared off…. While I am ok slowing down, sometimes, I feel like I am letting them down and it is hard to see who you were begin to fade.
But God….
He isn’t surprised by these changes; He prepares us and sustains us.
“Even to your old age and gray hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you.” Isaiah 46:4
God has adorned the aged with gray hair as a crown of splendor….
“it is attained in the way of righteousness.” Proverbs 16:31
He commands others to honor the aged….
“Stand up in the presence of the aged…” Leviticus 19:32
And after following Him, He promises…
“They will still bear fruit in old age, they will stay fresh and green, proclaiming, “The Lord is upright; he is my Rock…” Psalm 92:14-15
Wisdom comes with age…
“Is not wisdom found among the aged? Does not long life bring understanding?” Job 12:12
So, while I may fall asleep during a book, I have passed along the wisdom of how to read that book so I may listen. While I may be the one who finishes last in the running race, I can watch my healthy kids take the baton and run ahead. While I may be trading piggy back rides for gentler hugs or a slumber party on the floor for a nice solid bed, I am teaching my kids patience and endurance. I am showing them how to evolve with changes and remain.
The last several weeks, we have focused on the word finish in our Bible verses. There is something significant about “finishing strong.” Seeing things through. Not letting the wave crash in and wash you away but to remain. You may have things in your life changing, where you role is evolving, but through that change, remain in God. He will carry you, He will sustain you. Our God never fails. And one day we will be able to say:
“I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day—and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing.”
2 Timothy 4:7-8
Trading in my youth for a crown of splendor, wisdom, and honor with you, Julie
P.S. Today’s image is a flashback of 32 years ago, my 10th birthday compared to my 42nd birthday.
Father, Today I Surrender:
My Youth
Show me the next step I should take.