“The Lord God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.’” Genesis 2:18
As I went to bed last night, I said, “You haven’t sent me my “word” yet for tomorrow’s devotion. Can you do that soon?” Sometimes I know early in the week what God is teaching me and sometimes I am so enthralled in the lessons that I haven’t been able to wrap my head around the “what” I am learning about. But in the 4:00 hour this morning, I awoke and the whisper came: Relationships. So before the sun even peeked over the horizon, God invited me into relationship with Him so I may share what He has been teaching me on the value of a relationship with you and those in your life.
Relationships can be some of the most rewarding and most challenging experiences in our lives. The rewarding times make you want more. The challenging times may make you want to run to the hills and build a bunker, with a moat around it and maybe throw some crocodiles in it to keep out unwanted visitors! Sometimes it may leave you wondering why we build relationships at all? Isn’t it easier to keep on the surface with a lot of people and not go deeply into relationship or into a place of “connection and binding1” with others? If you think about some of your biggest hurts, fears, and insecurities, where did they come from? I’ll bet, if you dig deep enough, they related to a relationship that ended in a way that harmed or in a relationship that did not heal properly.
Sometimes to fill in the gap of someone dying or connections being broken with others, we fill those gaps in with, “Well maybe this person just came into my life to teach me …..” But that never settles well with me because the truth is, we are meant to be in relationship and God reminded me why.
In the beginning…..God shared with us two creation stories, both of which share His vision for relationship in humans, but the second one reveal God’s heart to me.
“…the Lord God formed a man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life.” Genesis 2:7
God goes on to put the man to work in the Garden, tell him what he can eat and what he can’t and realized:
“It is not good for the man to be alone, I will make a helper suitable for him.” Genesis 2:18
So, God formed animals and had him name them and tend to them; however,
“..no suitable helper was found….Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.” Genesis 2: 21-22
From the beginning God designed the world for humans to be in relationship with one another. From relationship comes love and life. God’s love for the world inspired creation and the love He fills in us for one another leads to creation. It is a beautiful circle of life.
This theme continued throughout the Bible over and over again. We see the fruits in the Bible from relationships that honored God like Ruth who stuck by her Mother in Law against many odds (Ruth). We also see the path of struggle for relationships that did not honor God such as when Joseph’s brothers sold him into slavery (Genesis 37) or when Jacob and Esau turned on one another (Genesis 25). I mean the list goes on and on. The Bible is filled with story after story of relationships gone wrong. Unfortunately, God’s design for relationships kept falling and history kept repeating itself over and over….
But God….
He knew what we needed. We needed Him here to be in close relationship with us. So, He sent Jesus down to dwell among us. First, to be in intimate relationship with Mary, in her womb. She labored over Jesus and held him close. She fed him, clothed him, changed his diaper. She wiped his mouth after he ate. She wiped his bottom when he had an accident. She cuddled him when he was sick. She formed deep relationship with him at intimate moments.
Jesus grew up and as He started His ministry He further showed us how to have relationship with others. He camped overnight with disciples; He placed hands on those who needed healing. He ate dinner with those who welcomed Him and knew they needed him. He comforted those who were weeping. He even wept with those who were mourning. Jesus was in deep relationship with those who allowed Him to be and they became better because of it. He challenged his followers and disciples, he didn’t just try to make them happy and smile. He did hard things for them and with them. And when He died….He knew the ache left behind. He knew we were designed for relationship with one another so He returned to comfort and continue that relationship. After his death, hearts ached for 3 days, but then He returned to show them He valued the relationship He had built with them. He didn’t stop there; He had several more encounters, showing His scars, eating with them, connecting with them. He didn’t just wave down from Heaven, He dwelt with them. He knew the value of relationship.
As a mom, often I am working to meet the needs of my family and not thinking about “What do I want to do?” and as my kids get more independent and room opens up to do what I may want to do, I often don’t have an exciting answer. God did something in me when He made me a mother; He taught me the value of just doing life with people and how beautiful it is. I could get invited to take a trip up in a hot air balloon, but if I had to leave behind those I love to go alone, I’d rather look out the window with those I am in relationship with and admire the balloon in the sky. At the end of the day, it is who is in our life, not what experiences we have that matter the most. So I may be playing tag at the park when I don’t feel like moving quick, or picking up poop after a pet when I don’t want to clean up…. I might be helping someone move or cleaning out a basement for someone that needs the help and guess what, there is no place I would rather be.
When I was a Food Service Director managing a lot of moving parts, I was trying to learn how to balance tasks with the phone, emails, and people stopping in my office. I was in a man’s office one day asking a question when I saw a quote hanging on his wall. It changed how I looked at every day of my life at work and it now sits just to the left of me at home on my desk. It reads:
“I always complained because my work was being interrupted until I realized the interruptions were my work.”
It isn’t from the Bible, but it may be related to this:
“Above all, keep loving each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.” 1 Peter 4:8
At the end of each day, I lay in bed at peace in the evening if my relationships are intact. I may not have finished the last load of laundry or dishes. I may have a task waiting for tomorrow. But if I have a relationship needing mending, I will drive across the country, write that note, make the phone call, send the text, or drop to my knees and beg God to help me restore because
“No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.” 1 John 4:12
Father, thank you for sending people to show us the value of relationships. For teaching us what grace looks like. For showing us how to love and how to forgive. Keep in us a soft heart that does not harden or get bitter but always remains ready to give love and ready to receive. Help us to remove our walls and build bridges with others to build your kingdom here on earth. We long for your return to be in relationship with us every day, so empower us to love one another the way you have designed us to so your love may be complete in us.
P.S. Today’s image is of my friend who taught me what relationships are all about. I will value you until my last breath and I will dance in heaven because of your grace, forever grateful.
Father, Today I Surrender:
My Relationships
Show me the next step I should take.