“Who are you to judge someone else’s servant? To their own master, servants stand or fall. And they will stand, for the Lord is able to make them stand.” Romans 14:4
Assumptions, easy to make, hard to take. That was an unintentional rhyme, but sure has proven true over the years. I’m not sure what “category” you find yourself in these days, but no matter what it is, people make assumptions about you. They may be good assumptions, they may not, but at the end of the day, it can sting to have a judgement formed over you based on assumptions and not facts.
Over the years, many have assumed that since I was a single parent, I was the person in highest need in that particular situation; however, the assumption that I was or of what I “need” wasn’t typically accurate. One time, I had a church give bags of gifts for my kids at Christmas when I already had a closet of prepared presents for them at home. While the thought was kind, gifts weren’t what we needed, rather maybe someone to sit and have dinner with us and hear the story or what was happening in our life. Other times, it was assumed I needed a “man” to fix the problems in my life, when what I needed was God (no offense men, you are valuable as a partner, not a savior). Or one that stings more than others is when people assume I cannot serve others in need or even receive my serving at all without guilt because my “need” may appear greater than theirs.
Living a life in a “category” layered with many assumptions is a web to untangle every time you meet someone. I am sure I am no stranger to this. My son is fascinated by prosthetic limbs. I bet many people walking around with one have assumptions made about their life all the time. A few times we have had the opportunity to come face to face with someone who has a prosthetic and I have helped him start the conversation rather than stare. “Tell me the story…” and you would be surprised at the light that fills the person as they feel for maybe a rare time; someone saw THEM rather than their circumstances. One day, we had a young man, a lifeguard missing most of one arm, go home, grab some of his prosthetic devices and talk with us well after pool hours sharing his story as my son took it all in amazed. That day, he may have gone home feeling like a hero with a superpower instead of a man with a weakness.
“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of others.” Philippians 2: 3-4
Often, we think we are looking out for the interests of others by doing them a “favor.” But sometimes, our favors imply that a person can’t “do” for themselves or that they cannot offer something to the world because of their circumstances. How often do we rob others of doing what God designed them to do? For we are told:
“Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of god’s grace in its various forms.” 1 Peter 4:10
God further explains that
“We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us…” Romans 12:6
Within the last few years, I felt a shift in my household as my boys got more independent and better able to serve others alongside me. It was nice to be the one able to go and do rather than receive; however, it was a gift to be on the receiving end of many beautiful acts of kindness over the years. One thing God did within me was teach me how to say “yes,” “Thank you,” and put a smile on my face while I was doing it. It brings people fulfillment to use their gifts and be appreciated. I too have that same desire. Not to be seen as the obstacles in my life, but to be seen as an overcomer of them. For others not to see “weakness” but strength. Not to be overlooked and discarded as a possibility for assistance, but to be seen as a source based on what I have walked through.
When I began to live my “truth” and my life looked like and matched what it really was, I began to better understand why so many people would rather hide. Because living in full truth isn’t always encouraged or supported and is followed by judgement and assumptions. However, I wouldn’t dare live another way. For the very things that “exclude” us from the world, are what prepare us to be “included” into the Kingdom of Heaven.
Father today, I hope that everyone reading who has felt assumptions made about them or believed their own assumptions about others can have their eyes opened. Help us to see that we all do this without even thinking most days and that we have hurt others by doing it, even those we love most. Sometimes our assumptions about ourselves have stopped us from using our gifts that you have blessed us with. Sometimes others assumptions have stopped them from receiving the gifts you want to bless them with. Let us see more and gain deeper understanding today. Help us to really see others the way you designed them today and every day going forward. Remind us that what may be seen as a weakness is how you make us stronger than ever. Love you Father.
The Beatitudes
He said:
3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4 Blessed are those who mourn,
for they will be comforted.
5 Blessed are the meek,
for they will inherit the earth.
6 Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
for they will be filled.
7 Blessed are the merciful,
for they will be shown mercy.
8 Blessed are the pure in heart,
for they will see God.
9 Blessed are the peacemakers,
for they will be called children of God.
10 Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
11 “Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. 12 Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you. Matthew 5: 3-12
P.S. Today’s image is the first Halloween God gave the three of us our superpowers that He would strengthen day by day.
Father, Today I Surrender:
My Assumptions
Show me the next step I should take.