Losing Everything

“If any of you wants to be my follower, you must give up your own way, take up your cross, and follow me.”    Matthew 16:24

After the significant “She Speaks” conference experience, I came home motivated with a task list, typing away at night. That slowly started to fade as the realities of life took over. In my season of stepping in faith, I had asked God “what would my life look like if I gave up everything to better follow you?” This is referenced in Mark 10:29. Well, those first steps of faith were exciting and full of joy and enthusiasm. However, time passes, circumstances change, and God began to challenge me in a season of loss and sacrifice. ‘She Speaks’ became She Let Go, She’s Busy, She Cries…..

In this season of loss and sacrifice, God led me to give up a lot of things, starting financially. He took my money and showed me how to spend it differently and to save. He led me out of a successful career to be more available to my children and other children to disciple. I sold my home to be available to “go.” I let go of dreams, friends and relationships, and a lot of my worldly possessions. I let go of my worldly “identity,” as He was making me aligned with my true self. I even returned to my maiden name during this time as He realigned me to His mission for me here.

My life had been burned to ash. (Isaiah 61:3). While it felt difficult at times, God was planting a New Hope and a New Future for me (Jeremiah 29:11). Just when I was settling into this transitional place, I experienced a few more “deaths,” endings of significant things in my life. One ripped me to pieces and took me to my knees.

I asked God “Now What?”

He whispered……”Finish that Book!”

At this point at least 3 years had passed. I felt a shell of who I was when I began. I didn’t even want to open the file. I thought, “I’m not her anymore.” So, I said, “Then breathe new life into it and show me what to do.” The next morning, I printed my table of contents out and was filled with light, clarity, new vision, and new direction. I had reached a new level of surrender which had prepared me for this work’s completion. I made a commitment to a book designer I met at the conference to resurrect the project and set a deadline given to me straight from above, manuscript submitted by June 1st! Guess when I emailed it? May 31st, one day early!! A work that had been going on for YEARS wrapped up in about 6 months. When God calls, He calls quickly!

The picture I share is terrible (my son took it at a 4-H Lego activity not per my request)! But it reflected how I felt during this season of loss and sacrifice. Not glamorous, hidden and set apart, humbled.

But God…..

He was teaching me one of the most significant lessons I had been taught, how to rise from the ashes after a loss and become more beautiful than ever before in every way. Have you experienced a season of loss? Are you in a season of loss? Are you headed towards a season of loss? I hope you will consider taking the journey with a friend and reading The Path to Surrender, Finding Your Way Back to the Flock to see how God walked me through my loss to the other side filled with abundance!

Much love and support on your journey, Julie