“No one lights a lamp and hides it in a clay jar or puts it under a bed. Instead, they put it on a stand, so that those who come in can see the light.” Luke 8:16
Have you ever had to tell the truth when it was really hard to do so? Have you chosen to be honest at a moment you thought you may lose someone in your life because of it or risk losing a job, friend group, or more?
My son was very brave this week when he had to confess as we were several miles from home and heading out of town that he wasn’t confident he had fed our pet cat. He may or may not have already caused us to be a bit late getting out the door and he may or may not have been reminded to do that task, and we may or may not now be over an hour later than anticipated. It took extreme courage to face that hard moment in the car of full, transparent honesty. He knew what the reaction may be and the sacrifice it would cause. He would have to have brave shoulders to hold the weight of the mistake because it was the right thing to do. Through my deep breaths although I had frustration, I was extremely proud of him. Despite the night moving on and being forgiven, he carried the guilt about the mistake the rest of the evening even with consistent reassurance that the lesson was learned and we could move forward. I re”Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it.” Matthew 10:39alized he had one more hurdle to overcome, forgiving himself.
I started to think back over the years of my life to moments it was really hard to tell the truth. To be completely honest. One sprang into my mind. I was in my early twenties. I was doing an internship out in San Diego to become a Registered Dietitian. I had been a good student, got things turned in on time, was thorough, on time, engaged. I sure had a lot to learn about my profession, but my work ethic was strong; however, one day, my integrity was put to the test. We had multiple rotations during our internship, some were independent and others we had partners. In all, there were 6 of us interns, most of who had traveled from the Midwest to call San Diego home for just under a year. On one particular rotation, we ended the week in the conference room and I can’t recall now what we were working on, but I remember it being Friday afternoon and we felt we had done everything we could for the day. We had not seen a supervisor in sometime and didn’t really know how to proceed forward. This was before cell phones were a big thing. So, we waited and waited and by late afternoon decided to call it a day, clocked out, and headed home. I had a reasonable commute home on a busy interstate. Not long after I arrived, my pager went off (yep, remember those?). My stomach dropped when I saw it was my internship director! She had never contacted me at home, so I took a breath and called back. She asked me where I was and despite wanting to state somewhere on the large hospital campus and come racing back, I had to face the truth, I was home. So, I paused and explained that I was home and why I was there. The next couple minutes were heavy. She was very upset, chastised me pretty good, and let’s just say I didn’t probably enjoy the weekend very much. I don’t know how I felt that Monday morning heading back in, but I did. The year ended successfully. I was even chosen to make the closing address at our graduation, but that moment I will not forget.
Honesty, It seems so simple, right? Just straight up tell the truth. Why wouldn’t we just fully disclose the truth? Besides some personality conditions, I think many want to be honest, but to be fully transparent as to decisions made, some would rather flee for the hills than stand and be brave in the truth. Maybe it has to do with fear of disappointing someone? Fear of what may change when truth pours out. Could it be fear of hurting someone you love or their opinion changing about you?
But God tells us that…
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:9
Regardless of what others think or if they choose to forgive us, regardless of if we get fired from that job, or lose our reputation, God will remain faithful to us if we confess our sins.
It can be a dark night of the soul (many nights at times) when you think through the reel of life. When poor decisions are replayed and mistakes are rehashed. The tendency may be to shove those down and run far away from them, but truth is always revealed.
“So do not be afraid of them, for there is nothing concealed that will not be disclosed, or hidden that will not be made known.” Matthew 10:26
When Adam and Eve made their first mistake, eating the fruit of the tree they were asked to avoid…
“…they hid from the Lord God among the trees of the garden.” Genesis 3:8
But…
“..the Lord God called to the man, ‘Where are you?’” Genesis 3:9
We may be tempted to run and hide when we make a mistake, are called to speak truth, or to be fully honest; however, God already “sees” us. When He calls for us, we should answer to what we have done, said, or not done or said. Yes, even our silence can be sinful.
“If anyone, then, knows the good they ought to do and doesn’t do it, it is sin for them.” James 4:17
Father, we present ourselves to you today ready to take a step towards full honesty in our lives. Show us where we need to confess. Remove our hiding spots. Give us courage to come forth and share what we are holding. To ask for forgiveness where needed. To speak words we have refrained from speaking so that sin does not take root. Let us be brave and trust that you will cover us with your feathers and under your wings we will find refuge; that your faithfulness will be our shield. We ask these things in Jesus name, Amen.
Confessing with you, Julie
P.S. Today’s image is of my oldest son and I. It is one of my favorite pictures from the summer. We share a deep connection created through honesty. We have faced many very difficult truths together. We have cried, yelled, and been at odds many times; however, no matter what knocks us down, we stand back up and look each other in the eye. I will be forever grateful for the genuine love that exists between us. Thank you Father for sending him to dwell with me.
Father, Today I Surrender:
My Honesty
Show me the next step I should take.